On why Patty shot the buck

(It’s been a while since I tried something like this, but should be fun. Feel free to add your own points, or give me a question for tomorrow)

Why did Patty, the Nawab, shoot the black buck?

1. The horny buck had made a pass at his shy wife
2. He was aiming for thin air, and missed
3. Like son, like father.
4. Damn the fellow who said ‘Gimme a buck, willya?”
5. It was entirely the buck’s fault. Patty was aiming for the signboard that said ‘The buck stops here’, and the buck saw the signboard and stopped in front of it.
6. Patty is a fan of the duck. And the buck was singing his own version – ‘The Buck survives’, an insult which Patty couldn’t take sitting down.
7. The buck came over and started singing ‘Kajrare’. Patty had had enough of that song.
8. Patty was one short of the largest collection of buck heads in the world. You know about sportsmen and their penchent for records, no?
9. Who said Patty shot the buck? The buck trotted over to Patty and pulled the trigger.
10. It was reflex action. Patty was holding the gun over his shoulder, looking away from the buck and someone stepped on his foot.
11. Sallu shot one. Why should Patty be left behind?
12. He was just cleaning the gun and it misfired
13. You see, the glass was half full. And the bottles of scotch were empty.
14. The buck was running, chanting “Faster than a speeding bullet…”. Patty just proved him wrong.
15. He has a thing, y’know, for dead animals. *wink, wink*
16. “I’m going to shoot the first thing that moves around here”
17. It was a good old western showdown. Except for the fact that the buck didn’t have guns. Nice hat, though.
18. It was a one on one. A death match. Patty won- Yay!
19. He wanted the buck’s head. Would’ve sent it to the underworld don trying to extract money from his son. No fish in sight.
20. “I’ve never fired a gun!” said the shy wife; “See, what you do is, take an aim and breathe in as you slowly squeeze…Whoa! Where did THAT come from?”
21. He was examining the gun when it…”Hey! I think this trigger is too loose. Oops!”
22. The buck was suicidal. The guns were just lying there.
23. The buck came up to Patty and said ‘Somebody sstop me!’. Patty did.
24. “The NatGeo people aren’t around. Who’d ever find out?”
25. Patty had missed the last few shots. Someone said ‘buck up’, and Patty did. Send him up, that is.

(okay. I think I’ll stop now)

Harneet has added 5 more. My favourite, now, is No. 28.


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  1. I loved most of ’em. Despite diminishing returns, let me have a go.
    34) He was a batsman, and merely attempted a hit towards buck-ward square leg
    35) A man must save his honour. The buck winked at Sharmila.
    36) He was DHL-ing the bullet, the buck got in the way.

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